notes from the road...day thirtyseven

Your old pal Sean is gonna try and get this here last blog done for the day.
So where are we? Milwaukee? Hmmm...yesterday, let's see if I can russle up some memories.
We woke up in Dan, Adie, Brian and Shannon's plush little pad, did the shower thing and got ready for a feast of the ages! In order to prepare for our mighty meal Dan, Shannon and I walked to Midget Mart. Everything was tiny! It was a store made for little people! We had to duck our heads to get in their little hobbit hole...just kidding. We're not sure why it was called Midget Mart, but the food we bought made for a large meal! Adie cooked us sausage, potatoes and french toast! Yum, yum yum. Yum, yum, yum. Yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum, yum. We listened to records for most of the morning, switching off our new gems with some stuff the housemates had. We discovered a band called The Resonars (Matt Rendon from The Knockout Pills) who were REALLY great! I gotta get all their records now! So after we filled our ears with good tunes and bellies with good food we made our way to The Lakeshore Brewery. Beer was consumed. A tour was held by a fellow named Nitro. He liked beer. A lot. Too much in fact. So he gave a tour of the brewery, sang songs, made quips, talked about hops and barley and things of that sort. T'was OK. Alex and Lee said there were girls dancing and waving their butts in the air on top of tables, but I didn't see any of that go down. Must've been good times though! So at the end of the tour we got free pint glasses from the Brewery and took a drive to a bar. We went full circle from the beer being made to the beer being served. The bar smelled funky, but they had free popcorn and they gave me a free cranberry juice, so that was cool. There was also a plaque on the wall that said we were official citizens of Kokomo, Indiana while we were in the bar. Not sure why or how, but it was nice to be included anyway. After the bar we went to the grocery store where Dan (not our Dan) bought supplies to make sushi for us! Back at the house we listened to some more records and chatted a bit in the living room. Lee rolled his first sushi thing and did a fine job on the first one (but fuuuucked up the second with the help of Dan and Alex). We also watched the new episode of Lost which was OK, but what about Locke's dad?! And Jack? Come on! Don't bring that Other back to your camp, she's obviously a plant! Stupid. Anyway, we left for the show which was to be held in someone's basement down the street, called The Vault. There were a bunch of locals there, which was nice to see. But we were unsure whether they would have any of our pop music. Chinese Telephones played first and were awesome! Banner Pilot from Minnesota played second, they were good too. Both bands were more of the punk variety so we were sure our songs about little kitties and birthday suits were going to be met with odd stares and cold shoulders. Not the case though! It was a GREAT show! P'rolly my favorite of the tour. Jen from San Pedro randomly showed up, t'was nice to see a familiar face so far from home. The people of Milwaukee danced and cheered and got naked! Well, one guy did during Birthday Suit. I guess he's known as The Naked Guy, that's his schtick. So he was completely naked up front with us while we played Birthday Suit and it was awkward and funny and he gave me a hug after the show. It was bound to happen someday I guess! So everyone enjoyed themselves, we played for 45 minutes or so and then met some really cool locals like one of the guys from The Mystery Girls and one of the dudes from Tuff Bananas and a bunch of other friendlies. Sorry, I'm bad with names so people are referred to as "guy", "dude" or "hey you!" It was a great show though, we had a blast and instead of partying with everyone else we headed back to Adie's house and chilled for a bit before going to bed. From here on out we will officially be known as The Party Poopers.

notes from the road...day thirtysix

us at the humility gallery. photo by bill


i was so looking foward to some chicago styled pizza on our way to the city. as it turns out, not too many people there eat it and i didnt really see any pie shops open. bunch uh jerks.
no one really said anything when i asked about the drive to chicago, sorry pals. "there was a lotta snow.." and a shrug was the best i could get outta 'em. we should really be doing this the following day, not awhole week later. umm, we rolled up to the place - it was an art exhibit/basement punk show venue. I remember they told us to park 'round back and there was already someone there so lee freaked out a little and wanted to keep driving around the block til they left. they did and someone came right along and parked where the other guys were. as we started to drive around, dan suggested, "who cares, just park in front of 'em." lee did after thinking about it fer a minute or two. with it being extremely chilly, the band loaded in super quicklike. i guess they were behind schedule so we had to play right away. before i could take off my snowhat and gloves sean was already starting "#1". fun fun fun. everyones hands were frozen so the set really stunk. there was a girl or two who enjoyed the set i believe. we talked with em up stairs, where a bunch of art was laying about, and sat around lights that were giving off some heat. i chatted up peoples while the other guys watched the next bands. too damn cold to be anywhere that wasnt directly under a heated light i says. the chinese telephones played a great set everyone says. fun fun fun. after they finished, Erin from Top Ten called dan and asked to borrow his twin amp, cuz they were playing a show in a bit near the downtown area. after dilly-dally'n we made our way to the show. they didnt have a guest list so sean, our three new buddies brino, addie and danny, and i waited in the bar til the lady finally let us into the concert area. i should also point out that sean, before letting the girl explain why to us that we could not enter to see top tens last four songs without paying, gave her the hand and walked away. there was a huge smile on my face and laughter exploding throughout my head. after she let us in, I jumped on a chair to see the last couple songs of theirs. Top Ten puts on a really great show, and Tina is always an exciting little package of greatness. we greeted everyone after the show. Some purty asian girls even came up to me and said hi. they member'd me from the pop festival the previous week! next were the goodbyes cuz the house we were stayin at was an hour and uh half away. Before headin outta town we decided to eat at sum mexican food joint. We called up Top Ten for another round of hellos and fun. but, my tooth cracked on a chip and one of my front teeth really hurt from fallin down the other day, so that put a stop to any enjoyment i was gonna have with yummy foods. as i type this i have to bite into an apple with the side of my mouth. yay! that was about it i think. we said our comical/seventeenth farewell and headed out to milwaukee. i slept while our truck driver sean drove. imma finish my apple and get lee to write the next one. hugs and kisses!

notes from the road...day thirtyfive

almost outta shows we be!!!
hi peoples. This is alex, and i've been sitting/napping in the van all day. i just ate a pb&j sammich so i am ready for the hitting of keys. oh god..i just found out what was after athens. detroit. well it wasnt really detroit; it was a li'l city next to it called hamtramck. who the hell spells like that? i bet they had a longer name but couldnt afford to write it out cuz that state is so poor. like me. my full name is actually alextramacky. anyways, before we arrived, we went to a record store in athens which was kinda shitty. everything was a repressing fer like twenty bucks. but! i did find a copy of the angry samoans, back to samoa for a buck. it was in a blank sleeve, but who cares. a buck! the drive to michigan was kinda fun i think. there was a tire rolling speedily on the freeway. hmm...maybe that was yesterday. when we started getting close, we became lost and pulled into a gas station to get better mapquest directions. ten sseconds after we turned the car off, a bum came up to the window, and told us to roll it down and he could help. i was scared for sean, for he would be in arms reach. the bum kept saying, "i work here. i work here. roll down the window." and, "gimmie that paper. gimmie a pen." i really thought he was gonna stab sean with the pen. looking back on that whole situation, it was pretty damn funny. well, we paid the guy a buck and lee gave him some instant noodle stuff for his diirections. we became lost like two minutes after we pulled outta the gas station and i wanted to get the money back from the guy. so we mapquested and finally arrived in hamtramck. it was prolly the coldest outta any night on tour in ole hamy. while loading in, dan chose to check his email like he was some king er somethin while we all froze to death. also lee's knee was still hurting. what a jerk. after that, dan and i walked against the chilly wind with our heads down to a grocery store across the street. the temperature was the work of the devil i think. some fella says to us, "time to go back home?" as we worked our way there. after we bought the essentials (pb&j makings, apples, bananas, carrots, and a $4 thing of grape juice we thought we lost but found the next day), we walked back and i sang some apiffy version of a nrbq song. "al, did you buy all the apples?" "yeah." "did you buy all the grape juice?" "yup." "he bought ALL the apples and grape juice!"
the bands we played with..gah. the first wasnt too bad. some older guys having fun playing pop musics. dan and i had a lil discussion about wanting bands to continue or not if their hearts are in it. i guess im an ass. after them, we played and it was a pretty swell show. "it was okay," says dan. but jeez, the band that was after us...i can honestly say that i havent seen a band that terrible in sometime. prolly top 3 outta my least favorites ive ever seen. have you ever seen a twenty year old, shirtless kid yarwl and sing about the 9/11 blues?? and they played fer like 1 & 1/2 hours. thinking they were no older than seventeen, i promptly thought about how i covered louie louie when i was 14 and in a punk band like they did to end their set. afterwards i found out they were like twenty-something. everyone was in shock of their disastrious abilities. also, according to dan, they opened up with rape me by nirvana. yarwl! i asked dan about how they probably were putting their hearts in it and he didnt really have too much to say. we ended up staying at the bass player of the gore-gore girl's apartment. Lee says it was really nice. i slept in the van. weeee!!

notes from the road...day thirtyfour

we woke up and went to the record store everyone told us was the greatest, jerry's, and it was. they had so much stuff. there were shelves of every style. it's extremely hard to type and listen to weird al at the same time, did you know that? so we swooped up all the good stuff before top ten got there and basically ruined richies day by findin the rubettes record. sorry! i got an andy kim record still sealed, ally got a dwight twilley record or two and lee, lucky bastard, got a bunch of tina's picks. ally and i were hungry so we went an got pizza. i think the girl there felt sorry for us cuz she gave us 2 extra pieces. walkin back to the van we saw a guy smokin a blunt. "smells good dont it" he said. it did sort of. so then we went to athens, georgia where scott, of blackout booking fame, was kind enough to get us a show. did anything interesting happen on the way there guys? nope. you know, i like weird al as much as the next guy, unless the next guy is sean or alex. its so loud! so we got to the union and said hi to scott and went to do some laundry for an hour or two. we busted out the record player and put on ohio express and next thing you know, it was a ragin bubble party. we danced with all the girls who'd ever been in laundry commercials, they kept popping out of the washers, which of course were overflowing with bubbles. i took a ride around the dryclean rack and alex played in the spin dryers til he got dizzy. it was really alot of fun. after that we were all clean and ready to rock so we went back. it was still too early so scott gave us some money fer food and warned us not to eat the burritos, which would surely be too heavy for rockin. so we ate way too much pizza instead. it wasn't great but we were hungry. like always. after a great set of covers by a side band of scott's the exceptionals played their exceptional take on rock an roll silliness. up next were the tired, fat and braindead makeout party. the show was fantastic. the kids loved it and danced, but fer some reason we couldn't keep it together. i snapped a string right before the solo on wreckless and alex tells me i couldnt sing that night. it was very smoky in there. of course it didn't matter, everyone had a good ol time. up next was paper machetes who were fun and catchy angular weird-punk. the kids liked them too. so we went to the paper machetes house, thinking it was gonna be a chill night of byrds records and sleep, but when we got there it was college party nightmare time. backwards hats, white kids rappin along with wu tang, drunk and desperate girls, the whole nine yards. so we went to sleep in the van and next door. where it was quiet but COLD. it was snowing all day that day, but since it didn't really stick the locals call it a flurry. all in all a good time, except that lee threw the leftover pizza away. what is wrong with him anyway?
Ps. alex here. just wanted to let you all know i was very excited to get to bed before we loaded out and ran up some stairs, with my hands in my coat pockets, then fell right on my face. luckily dan was the only one who saw me cry like a baby at the sight of blood comin outta my mouth. it was just a busted lip though, me teefs are still in place.

notes from the road...day thirtythree

we woke up in our hotel and sat around jivin with the aforementioned machine fer a bit then it was back on the road. today's drive was a short one but longer than we expected fer some reason. i hate it when that happens. our destination was a BBQ in pittsburgh, maybe thats why it felt like it took so long. we were so hungry! when we got into town lee was totally losin his shit. there WERE psychedelic dinosaurs around, but it wasn't that big a deal. also you dont need to mentally undress every girl you see walking down the street. its just wrong. so after lee's wild ride through insanitown, we arrived at paul from modey lemon's house. the BBQ was heatin up and we would have to wait. but not too long! the burgers were delicious and i smothered mine with honey dijon mustard which i now love. we sat and chatted with Tina and Erin from Top Ten and ate and ate. there was steak and chicken and fer the veggies there was squash and zuchini and other stuff i cant remember but it was all good. the highlight of our eating experience had to be the charbroiled pineapple. yes, pineapple. they put jus a lil bit o cayenne pepper on it and throw it on there and then booyah! candy! we ate and ran outta stuff to talk about so tina and erin got bored and went inside to play some records and generally get the party started. there were chocolate covered strawberries in there! we ate those up and then kept on dipping whatever was handy. i chatted up richie and cole from top ten and they were just as friendly as they look. thank you for the ciggarrettes. we found out later that richie is big time. he played in winona ryders and drew the cover to green day's dookie! whooda thunk? then it was time fer the show. we played ok to a bunch a people who at best thought we were ok. top ten was rulin as always but they said it wasn't their best show. next we were to meet michael from the cynics. he definately thought we were more than ok. not me so much, me he called a whore cuz i gots the face aids, but sean alex and lee were hot stuff! seans the cute one is now the official party slogan. i hung out at the bar and got free drinks from a guy who was chattin erin up and my cheeseburger never came. meanwhile lee got dry humped and fondled all over the bar. it was as if a gay lee from the future came back to treat himself the way he would like to treat others. our appetites are never quieted however so we went to track down the most mysterious of sandwiches. we dont know what the place was called but it's open all night and they got cole slaw and french fries inside the sammy. i got the spicy sausage that paul said was his favorite and owlx got roast beef so we split'em up. the hot sausage was definately better but they both were pretty good. owlx remained unimpressed. how was your sandwich sean? it was a ham sandwich that was good. the cole slaw made an interesting addition. after eating i think it started to rain a little and we went back to paul's. alex and i slept in the van and lee and sean went inside. i guess a couple people still were chillin but it wasn't anything to write about (although i just did). i love falling asleep to the sound of rain inside a car.

notes from the road...day thirtytwo

so can you tell we're over it? i'm gonna have to ask where we even were. Philadelphia, the city of brotherly love came through on the name for us. we arrived way too early cuz widdo babies no wikey new york. we got to the empty club around 2 and told the bartender we were the band. he figured we were gonna say that. we asked fer a good place to get a philly cheese sammich and he obliged. the sammich was good and they also had the largest pizza slices i'd ever seen.sean and lee slept in the van while ally and i did what we always do, wander. philadelphia is a strange city. there's alot of old buildings there that i wish i knew how to describe. they got staues on top of some and you get a strange feeling when you look up at em. i dunno. also they had a park like area with giant sorry and monopoly pieces everywhere. is milton bradley from there or something? ally an i couldn't figure it out. so we wandered back after getting some apple juice, which i learned is gross lukewarm. only 8 more hours to show time! we sat in the van and listened to sundae girl and other hits on our portable record player. a cop ate in the pizza place next to us for like 2 hours. it was crazy, he kept eating and eating. like he was a pig or something it weirded us out. 4 more hours to show time! i took off my shoes and socks and let my natsy natsy feet air out a bit. also i rubbed them for like an hour or so cuz new york messes yer feet up bad, son. after that my hands were very smelly so i washed them. they had watered down dish soap in the bathroom to wash your hands with. 3 more hours to show time! eventually, our buddies the pop machine came into town and called us so we went and hung out a bit. i actually just sat in the van and slept a little. there was no one at the show except a local or two and a few friends of the aforementioned machine but the bar still fed us delicious huge hamburgers, salads, a deep fried candy bar with ice cream and booze. each drink ticket got you a beer and a shot. how's that fer brotherly love? so we played to the one person in the audience and it was pretty fun. i was feelin sick and sad, so we played a bunch of downer stuff that night. i love bringin' em down. after we played, the bar kinda turned into a party of sorts and we hung out fer an hour or so. when the non drinkers had enough of that crap we went off in search of a motel that the aforementioned friends of the aforementioned machine were kind enough to pay for ("it's really cheap" they said "only 88 dollars!"). so we watched an old episode of lost and went to sleep. also i covered my face aids (non communicable impintigo dammit!) while i talked that night, prompting lee to taunt me bout copying fever b. if only i could, lee, if only i could.